Famous Quotes

Between two evils, I always choose the one I never tried.
Mae West

Raised to respect the conventions, love had to end in marriage. I'm afraid it did.
Bette Davis

By trying we can easily endure adversity. Another man, I mean.
Mark Twain

California is a great place to live - if you happen to be an orange.
Fred Allen

Hygiene is always important when godliness is unlikely.
P. J. Orourke

Cross country skiing is great if you live in a small country.
Steven Wright

Leave a flattering woman coax and cajole and deceive you, she is after your barn.
Hesiod

Do not forget Mother's Day. Or as they call it in Beverly Hills, Dad'sDay third wife.
Jay Leno

Based on my good command of the English language, I saidnothing.
Robert Benchley

Electricity is really just organized lightning.
George Carlin

Every mans dream is to be in the arms of a woman sinking withoutfalling into his hands.
Jerry Lewis

I love children - fried.
W. C. fields

I love long walks, especially when they are taken by people who suffer from me.
Fred Allen

I love marriage. The idea.
Toni Morrison

I looked at my family and I discovered that the juice.
Rodney Dangerfield